Domestic violence expert shares tips about how to help those in need

RAPID CITY, S.D. (KEVN) - In light of a video circulating earlier this week showing popular rapper Sean “Diddy” Combs assaulting his then-girlfriend, KEVN News spoke with a domestic violence expert who shares tips to help those affected by abuse.

According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, more than 10 million men and women are physically abused by a partner in the United States annually. Let’s break it down even further, this would equate to 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experiencing some sort of physical abuse. Sheryl Kurland advocate and founder of Find Your Fabulosity which focuses on empowering those affected by domestic violence says after seeing the Sean Combs and Cassie Ventura video, she feels it’s important for people to know the signs of abuse.

“Visual is somebody is being beaten and bruised. There’s obvious bite marks. There’s obviously all kinds of physical, maybe broken limbs and they always have excuses for the reasons that those things are there on their body. And invisible is more emotional where someone is downgrading you all the time. They’re calling you names, telling you how awful you are and nobody would ever want you,” Kurland said.

Kurland has seen the effects domestic abuse has on people, particularly women. After volunteering at her local shelter and seeing what she described as women who were “a shell of themselves” Kurland realized more needed to be done to empower them. She thought back to a saying her mother would tell her.

“She’d go ‘Sheryl, just go put on a little lipstick’. And I thought about that and I went to a store and I bought like 25 lipsticks and I took them to a workshop and I gave them out to all the women at the end of the workshop. And all of a sudden the sun came out and every single person in that room there was joy and happiness and I couldn’t believe what I was seeing,” Kurland said.

Hence, Find Your Fabulosity was born. Kurland says the lipstick is symbolic of women gaining their power back.

“That to them a lipstick has far deeper meaning. It means ‘I have a voice. I have an identity. I’m beautiful inside and out.’ And a lipstick is really truly a beacon of hope and a beacon of healing for women who are victims.”

Kurland says it’s important for those who know someone who is affected by violence it’s best to just be there for them and encourage them to report it on their own time.

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